Seasons of Love

My mom shows her love by giving unending acceptance and unbridled freedom. Whatever you want, however you want it, she offers it to you, because she loves you. Sadly, as a child I didn't feel loved by this; I felt abandoned and neglected. My mom thinks I'm mean to my children because of all the rules I have for them. But I'm showing them I love them by protecting them and giving them boundaries to make them feel safe. My mother ran away from home to escape all the rules and regulations her parents gave her. Do we all look at love from a 360 degree perspective than what I parents gave us? Do we all strive to give what we felt we were lacking in our childhoods to our progeny? I don't know.

I am trying to remember that love is still love, even if it doesn't come in the package I prefer. I am trying to fight my freakishly honest nature and my big mouth from hurting the people around me. I hope I can be honest without being blunt. Maybe it's just another thing I'm giving the world because I feel like I don't get enough of it: Honesty.

Truthiness

I can't help it, I will most likely tell you exactly what I'm thinking. I mean, geez, why are you asking unless you want my honest opinion. I am sorry that my honest opinion wasn't something you liked. It didn't make you warm and fuzzy, it didn't applaud your anger as righteous or justified. My advice was and still is to chill the hell out. 'Nuff said.

I ain't yo homie

Uh oh, it's that time again. The time when I realize that I am, in fact, no one's close friend, except Hubs. It starts the same way. I have some extra time at work, I hop on myspace or facebook and *BLAM* I see it. All my "friends" are having superawesomecool lives out there, and I AM NOT A PART OF IT!! I am, in fact, just a sad sack of ickyness that spends her entire life either working or sleeping; rinse, wash, repeat. This line of thinking will almost certainly lead to thought of why I'm overweight, which is an express lane to the mire of "NOBODY LOVES ME" which will, in fact, be followed by a rousing chorus of I should just go eat worms.

Sheesh. Perhaps I will skip all the prelimonary steps and just go home, get drunk, and cry myself to sleep watching the Lifetime channel and wondering why all the women on there get beat up, raped, and addicted to drugs.